Free trading

By Rabid Reseller on Aug 31, 2006 10:40 AM
Filed under Software

Rabid Reseller needs to expand its markets in order to survive. We know this is true because we read it in the newspapers and saw it on websites.

OPINION: Rabid Reseller needs to expand its markets in order to survive. We know this is true because we read it in the newspapers and saw it on websites.

Although you can’t believe everything you read in the newspapers, surely it must be true when the same thing appears on several websites.

That’s what’s known in the industry as multiple sources. We’re still checking if the other source has to be a website not owned by the newspaper publisher, but there’s no point delaying our expansion plans over semantics.

Rabid has just about exhausted every local opportunity so it’s time to crack the world’s biggest market in the good old US of A.

This is no longer a daunting exercise because we now have the Free Trade Agreement. The Yanks are free to trade with us and we’re free to trade with them, and they’re not allowed to use any tariffs or quotas to stop us.

Since the internet is global, we’ve duplicated the Rabid website by leaving off the .au on the end. It won’t be long now before an army of US geeks swarms all over

It turns out that ‘rabid’ has a few connotations for our American cousins that we didn’t consider fully. Our quarantine laws are so good we’d never heard of rabies before the US-website almost went live.

Judging by the number of comments on the beta-website from people who appear to be frothing at the mouth, we can only assume the problem is real over there, so we’re changing our name to suit our export ambitions.

Besides, the truth is someone has already got that URL but those dudes are either dyslexic or have a speech impediment judging by the furry bunny logos.

There sure is a lot of rabidity over there. We’ve tried multiple variations on the rabid theme to no avail.

Perhaps we need to aim for a minimalist approach. If it was alright for Little River Band to become LRB when visiting the USA then we shouldn’t have a problem with RR.

Okay, so those initials are also used by some uppity car maker. This is proving much harder than we expected and so far we’re only trying to get a name for the website.

We’ll run a competition for a new name to use in the USA, and meanwhile get stuck into background reading on the Austrade website.

Whoa! Those sneaky Yanks have signed FTAs with a few other countries! According to the website there are “over 60 other designated countries for eligible procurements.”

Well as long as they stay focussed on procuring, which we thought was illegal, we might still have a chance of flogging some computers. The exchange rate should definitely help matters, if we can manage to remember to convert everything from dollars to dollars – like that even makes sense.

How come they use the same name for their money as we do? It’s not like anything else over there has the same names. Try ordering a biscuit with your coffee and you’ll find out what we mean.

Gotta go y’all! Customers waiting!
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Free trading
This article appeared in the 21 August 2006 issue of CRN.

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